I’m delighted to announce the creation and publication of my new blog, The Widow Chronicles. As some of you may know, my husband was diagnosed with bile duct cancer in May 2020 and given 4 months to live. With chemo, he stretched that out to December of 2020. I’ve had a momentous year – losing my spouse of 37 years, selling the family farm of 25 years, moving to the burbs, and raising a teenage son as a single mom.
Why write a blog about all this?
- It’s cheaper than therapy.
- I’ve written virtually nothing during this time (husband’s obit doesn’t count – or does it?), and I need to move on from yelling at phone companies, buying and selling real estate, kicking financial institutions in the butt, etc. – and get back to writing.
- Ok, to get serious, when my mom died several years ago, a friend listened to all I’d been through and learned. She told me I had a duty to share what I’d learned with others in my situation. Have I learned a lot this past year? Oh yeah. Do I have anything to say that might help someone else? I would hope so.
We all read to know that we are not alone in our deepest thoughts and feelings. If you are in deep pain, it sometimes helps to know that somebody in the history of the world has gone through the exact same thing and had the same feelings about it. Or maybe they had a different take on the situation, and maybe their story might shine some light on yours.
I became a widow in the middle of a global pandemic. The usual support groups, grief counselors, church groups, and other resources for new widows just weren’t available. I had to figure it out on my own. I read books and internet articles. Some helped; others didn’t jibe with my own experiences and feelings at all.
So maybe it’s time to take a fresh look at what it’s like to be a new widow in the 21st century. Once upon a time, societal norms would tell you exactly what to wear, how to behave, and when to move on or not after a spouse’s death. But all those norms have gotten a bit dusty, if not completely irrelevant. Though in large part a memoir, I hope my new blog will take a stab at opening up new ways of dealing with widowhood that make sense in today’s world.
If you are going through the grieving process or regularly deal with those who are, feel free to subscribe to my new blog at www.widowchronicles.blog (it’s free; just type your email in and it will magically appear in your in box every time I post). You can also follow me on social media.
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